• Most fun thing the FDA has approved since birth control pills.

• Looks like someone at NASA saw Iron Man 2...

• And you are my beer fetcher and will henceforth be known as GetMeAColdOne.0...yep. I love you Willow Garage.

• God, Allah, Zeus, Buddah, Santa...I promise to be good and never ask for anything ever again if you let me go to iHeaven...conveniently located in Shanghai

• At least I'll get a reward for shopping at prep central with my girlfriend...guess I better find those boat shoes she bought me...

• This Halloween is going to be frickin' awesome...just call me Peter Parker...

• Doc Brown would be so proud...

• Now when I am feeling emo I can sip my caramel macchiato and blog...

• And you thought political advertising campaigns were brutal.

• T-Pain meets Trebek...

• IT's HERE!!!

• And now I can say Suck It! to all the teachers and professors who complained about my chicken scratch handwriting...

• My girlfriend said I should give back more to the community...so I found this...score!

• It's George Orwell's vision of Baywatch...somehow it's not as entertaining as the original.

• All I want for Christmas is to be a Jedi...

• Now we can have the best of both worlds.

• Meet my new BFF Will G....he is going to win me so much dough it's not even funny.

• I am the new James Bond of laziness...

• Maybe now my girlfriend will let me get one as long as it matches the living room decor she worked so hard on...lies.

• There goes my Saturday night...two words: Penis Detector...

• Its almost here!...14 days and counting...

• It's like making my own Pixar movie while ignoring all my overdue notices...

• Batbike gone eco-friendly.

• iPad = iLeak...haha.

• I want it! But my wife says to leave the military ray guns to Tony Stark...

• Suicide rate for iPhone users just went off the chart...

• Who you gonna call?

• If I didn't know any better, I'd say he's overcompPENsating for something...

• It's a revolution in the world of drug dealing...

• When I picture myself as Superman, I don't look like a dumbass...just sayin'.

• Apple may give Google the pink slip...everyone's getting laid off these days.

• I am Marty McFly...of the future

• Can I just say that all of the Kindles, Nooks and all other E-Readers are all the same and nothing can replace the Playboys in my bathroom...

• But the real question is will it fill in for me on game days when my wife wants to spend "quality time" together?

• iPhone is the greatest phone alive!...sorry Blackberry fanboys.

• This new accessory is going to make hookin' up with random chicks a little more difficult.

• Let's hope they don't roll-back on your minutes...

• If Sex and the City and Revenge of the Nerds had a baby, it would wear these.

• Should someone warn the schools?...nah

• Drunk doornob for dummies...

• 3D without the glasses? Let the seizures begin...

• If you can read this bumper sticker, prepare to be set ablaze...

• Because Wii Madden just wasn't real enough...

• Looks like CSI is going to have some tough robotic competition...

• The first electric clown car! Ringling Brothers better jump on this...

• Hot girls in color is fine but when will it be available in 3D?

• So at 3 o'clock the car just dies too?

• As cell phone technology gets more inventive, so do my explanations to the wife about how I keep paying for it all...

• Because scratching my own back is just silly...

• Am I tripping or is the vacuum cleaner watching me?

• It's the stoner's ultimate birthday present...

• You can almost smell the pigskin through the phone.

• No officer, I don't know how fast I was going. My jet pack didn't come with a speedometer.

• I know what my fiance is getting at her bachelorette party...my balls.

• Espionage pedophilia? The things technology has brought us...

• Vibrations and black light? Sounds like my kind of device...

• The iMaxi. It comes in red. I think I just vomited a little in my mouth.

• TV, Internet, MP3 player... can it pop open a cold beer and make me a sandwich?

• Does picking up your dog's crap suck? Well, now you can suck up your dog's crap. Check it out...

• Phone or computer? Guess we'll find out soon enough...

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